Are you the annoying co-worker?
Are you the annoying co-worker?
At my last job, before I got an office, I was in a cubicle behind a girl named Kelly. She would get soooo angered by the clinking of my spoon as I ate a bowl of cereal that her eyes would bulge, her face would turn red, she would turn to me with lips pursed until they were white and through clenched teeth would growl, "could you STOP IT with the goddamn SPOON!?"
haha those were the days.
Most grating coworker traits (in my opinion):
- "chit-chatters" who can't take a hint that you actually may have some work (or web surfing) to do and can't limit their story about thier cats, failed familial relationships, or problems with thier bosses to a reasonable time frame. Don't these people read body language?? If I am actively engaged in the conversation, giving you my full attention, smiling, nodding, not yawning, etc., feel free to continue. If I have turned back towards my computer, have begun clicking around on the desktop, am answering in distracted grunts only, and desperately eyeballing my phone praying it will ring, its time to go away!
- "can't mind thier own business" who make it a point to comment/complain/specifically notice the activities of other coworkers such as how many vacation or sick days they take, how often they are late, how much time they spend in the bathroom, or whatever. That is for that person's boss / supervisor to worry about!! Mind your own! I actually had an ex-coworker who would tell me that working at 9:00 a.m. meant actually working at 9:00 a.m. and that if i wanted coffee in the morning I should come early, so I would be sitting at my desk by 9. Jesus, office nazi, mind your own freakin business!
- "complain about every stupid little thing" people who get HR to send out office-wide emails or post notes in the lunchroom about stupid gripes such as leaving 23 seconds on the microwave and not hitting cancel, leaving a mug in the sink overnight, a coffee ring left unwiped on the counter, not replacing the napkins when you used the last one, etc.
- "the IT guy" one bit of advise: don't act so damn superior and smug!! No one thinks you are a genius because you roll your eyes and act condescending, and others are not idiots because they can't do your job (can you do thiers?)
- "toots his own horn" the guy who sings "I am the bomb" and "I am a genius" over and over again in the voice and tune of a song from 'Shaft' (jus' kiddin Shwag, you know I love it!)
who thinks they work with the most annoying coworker?
posted by Evil Genius @ 11:07 AM
9 comments
9 Comments:
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Yes the spoon was annoying as all hell. I do believe that you also slurped your coffee quite loud as well. You were quite the annoying little wandering jew. I still love you though.
I can add one to the list. What about your former boss here!!!!
Kelly
At my previous job there was a dude who, when he had to urinate, would approach the urinal and drop trow. I'm talking down around the ankles. Everything. Like I did when I was 3.
Oh, I used to work with this guy that.... no, wait, that was me. Never mind.
"Who's the smart smug prick
that's a sex machine to all the chicks?
(Shwag!)
(You damn right.)
"You see this cat Shwag is a bad mother--
(Shut yo mouth)...
...He's a complicated man
but no one understands him but his woman."
how about the bosses that get pissed off when ur 10 minutes late in the morning but never mad when u always stay 30-45 minutes late each nite.
or the stupid skinny ass bitch boss who gets all huffy at you when the whiney-psychotic-OCD-evil-no-one-wants-to-work-with-her-consultant gets mad cuz i won't stick my nose up her ass and goes complaining and boohooing to the aforementioned bitch boss about it.
im not bitter or nothing :-p
I totally *am* the annoying coworker-- all of those are true with the exception of one.
Here's my response to those points:
1.)Always late
Guilty as charged.If you don't like that I come in late and you come in on time, then, you are welcome to also come in late! Furthermore, I work late every day (because I am too lazy to leave on time!) whereas everyone else is out of here at 5 of.
2.) Coffee snob
Guilty. Folgers drip coffee tastes like *ass and every one here who drinks it agrees. They are just too lazy to get something else, or will drink anything so long as its free!
3.) Eats wack food
Guilty. but I don't stink up the lunchroom with it, because I don't ever eat in the lunchroom. Its like a bunch of gossipy chickens in there.
4.) Coffee rings on the counter
This is the only one thats not true. I am a neat-freak at work. My area is clutter free and I wipe down my desk with clorox disinfecting wipes every day. If I see a coffee ring someone else left in the lunchroom, I wipe it up!
hehe i LOVE this! Speak of annoying coworkers. These are classic pointers on how to make people crazy! shit is hilarious!!!
HOW TO KEEP A REASONABLE LEVEL OF INSANITY
1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in"
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation marks
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14.. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard Kim.
17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!" "3rd time this week!!!!!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, "runfor your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner. "dueto the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.......
20.Send this to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this.
hell yeah you eat wack-ass food.
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